Slum Lord City

Since living in Chicago, I've lived in 5 different apartments.
I've had 4 landlords.
The first three were great.

First there was the middle aged irish man with the best accent and the warm personality.
Then there was the coolest/craziest old lady who only accepted cash payments for rent and her super nice gay son who would fix anything at anytime because they lived in the building. And they let us move within the building and charged us basically nothing in rent.
Then there was the mexican family who would drive out the day I called if the hot water heater shut off and even sent me a Christmas card (the only card I received that year.)

Then I moved to the north side, into a three bedroom that apparently was being foreclosed and is now owned by an equity company.
So there is no "landlord" per say
Well there was, but apparently he is now or was in court.

But that's just the icing on the cake.

In my now 4th year of living in Chicago, I've gone through more crazy crap dealing with this apartment than ever before.

Sure my hot water used to go out every couple months at my last place - but the landlord fixed it that day.

Here is a shortened list of everything that's gone wrong or that I suspect is wrong or that is just plain wrong - since we moved in:

1. Moved into an apt with no heat/hot water, no stove or fridge. Two weeks later we had the fridge and hot water but it took another week and a half to get the stove.
2. Whenever it rained, my roommates room would leak. It has still yet to be completely fixed.
3. Our bathroom sink sprays everywhere whenever you use it. I have given up on it coming out normally ever.
4. One day the power went out. It was only our apartment, which meant we just needed to trip the breaker. Luckily the breaker was in the basement with the door locked and we didn't have the key. Somehow the food in our fridge stayed good for the next 7 hours.
5. One day, while sitting in the living room, I heard a dripping. I looked into the bathroom to see a waterfall coming out of the ceiling. Thank god for empty garbage cans.
6. Our lease states we get a parking spot. There are only two spots and three apartments with three cars. The parking wars happened every day. My roommate with the car hates the bitch upstairs.
7. The bitch upstairs in the attic lives in an illegal apartment (no front entrance anyone?) with (her?) kids and some dude(s) and according to our upstairs neighbor she has never paid rent. She also throws shit off her balcony like clothes and mops that stay in the tree and our backyard forever.
8. Multiple days of no hot water and a landlord who never picks up his phone. He refuses to talk to me most likely since I leave messages with a nasty tone.
9. An electric bill for $700 based on a two year estimate since the electric company now says that they have never had access to the meters (also in the basement with no key) and now we are in the middle of disputing this as we have received a monthly bill and have paid it each month so we have no idea where this bill is coming from.
10. The right side of the kitchen sink (it's a double sink) cannot be used as the pipe underneath is completely disconnected and leaks water everywhere (ruining my dryer sheets underneath.) Two messages left, nothing returned.

Ten seems like a good number to stop at and hopefully my mind has just erased any other annoying shit that's gone down.

Oh and now the company's phone number does not even work. Apparently the number is being checked for "problems." Yeah, they need to be checked for problems alright.

The problem is, the apartment itself is huge, the heat is free (radiator) and the location is perfect for all of us. (The rent is also VERY REASONABLE.)

But we are all getting to the ends of our ropes on all the multiple issues that have affected us all.
From rain water in a bedroom, to lack of hot water, to an electric bill that could ruin credit.
We want to stay, we like the neighborhood, we like living with each other and moving is such a fucking pain in the ass.

Not to mention that the "landlord" doesn't even cash our rent checks until the last day of the month.
I guess if he doesn't really need the money, he won't notice if I don't even pay for next month.
I mean, he can't even return my phone calls so I doubt he would notice or miss it.

In the meantime I guess I'll start browsing craigslist again.
damn.